This article is one in a series of articles about explaining our Mormon beliefs to our friends. See other articles in this series.
Some members of the Church are not prepared to answer questions when asked why the Lord commanded some of the early Saints to practice plural marriage prior to 1890.
Here are some resources with information to help you answer such questions:
- Read the topic “Polygamy (Plural Marriage)” on LDS.org. You can find it in the menu on LDS.org by clicking Teachings > Gospel Topics > “Polygamy (Plural Marriage).” You may also want to read the topic “Marriage.”
- Read the article “Polygamy” from the Church’s Newsroom. Notice several additional links on the right side of that page.
- Read the article “Do Mormons practice polygamy?” on Mormon.org
I hope you find these resources helpful.
What other ideas do you have that you can share with others? Post them in the comments below.
is it not true that as far a polygamy is concerned, LDS men can still have multiple women sealed to them today, so polygamy is still considered acceptable in the afterlife?
Temple Marriage – The purpose of a temple marriage, referred to in the scriptures as “the new and everlasting covenant of marriage” (D&C 131:2), is to seal a husband and wife for time and eternity, faithfulness. depending on their faithfulness. Through this ordinance, a couple’s children may also be part of their eternal family. Only a marriage that has been sealed in the temple and confirmed by the Holy Spirit of Promise can be eternal (see D&C 132:7).
Sealing of a Husband and Wife
Living Women – A living woman may be sealed to only one husband. If she is sealed to a husband and later divorced, she must receive a cancellation of that sealing from the First Presidency before she may be sealed to another man in her lifetime (see “Applying for a Cancellation of Sealing or a Sealing Clearance” on this page).
Living Men -If a husband and wife have been sealed and the wife dies, the man may have another woman sealed to him if she is not already sealed. If a husband and wife have been sealed and later divorced, the man must receive a sealing clearance from the First Presidency before another woman may be sealed to him (see “Applying for a Cancellation of Sealing or a Sealing Clearance” on this page). A sealing clearance is necessary even if the previous sealing has been canceled.
Well, our sealing policies also say a deceased woman can be sealed to all the husbands she’s had in mortality, so at the end of the day, women will be just a polygamous as men. I haven’t read anywhere in modern church material that men won’t have to choose between spouses but women will. Everything says if the participants to the sealing ordinance keep their covenants, those ordinances are binding. Sure, technically speaking, a deceased woman would have to “accept” a sealing ordinance performed on her behalf, as well as that second husband. However, I’ve never heard of anyone in a happy marriage — whether it be a second marriage or not — who didn’t say they wanted to be with all spouses they had in mortality for eternity. Hence, men will have plural wives in the afterlife, and women will have plural husbands, too.
FWIW, I would have to say we don’t “practice” polygamy in this life. But we certainly believe we’ll practice it in the hereafter. So, be careful how you discuss this with a nonmember because if he/she does a little research and sees that prominent church leaders (as well as regular members) have remarried after the death of their first spouse and been subsequently sealed to a second spouse, the nonmember will most certainly dump egg in your face! Since we equate the sealing ordinance with eternal marriage, we surely do believe many of us will be polygamous in the next life. As an aside, it will be interesting to see how many predeceased spouses have, like their surviving counterparts, “moved on” in the Spirit World and also “remarried” so that their relationships with others are sealed during the Millennium, too.
“Oh, the ambiguity of it all.” Bro. Richman, if you’re reading the comments, can you please explain our doctrine? The newsroom piece says monogamy is the doctrine of the church. Then why do we allow plural sealings at all? Why not have a sealing policy that permits living men and women to only be sealed to one person at a time? Then, in the case of more than one marraige arising out of remarriage after widowhood and so forth, seal deceased people to all spouses they managed to have in mortality, with the notion that we’ll all have to pick and choose amongst many so we’ll be monogamous in the celestial kingdom? Either we’re going to be monogamous or plural. Doctrinally, we seem to be wanting to have our cake in mortality (respectful serial monogamy) but eat it in the afterlife (plural sealings.) Roughly 5% – 8% of LDS members, as well as the population at large, remarry after the death of a spouse. We’ll seal all those marriages. Does that mean only 5% – 8% will be plural in the Celestial Kingdom? Anyway, you can see why trying to explain polygny as it was practiced in the early days of the restored church is one thing. Trying to explain we don’t practice polygny and polyandry in light of feelings and sealings of eternal marriage is quite another.
When the Mormon church says they have nothing to do with polygamy, they should add, “not any more and not at this time.” Mormon doctrine defends their earlier practice of polygamy as God-mandated, still allows for multiple wives in the hereafter, suggests that God Himself may be a polygamist, and holds that God may someday reinstate polygamy. The book It’s Not About the Sex My A** by Joanne Hanks does a good job explaining much of that. Or read the Doctrine and Covenants (which the Mormons regard as scripture), Section 132, where God out-and-out states that taking multiple wives is a COMMANDMENT.