Seth Adam Smith‘s lastest article in the Huffington Post “Would Everyone Be Happier Without Me?” addresses the serious issue of suicide.
Some time ago, I did keyword research for a project on suicide prevention. One of the things that shocked me the most was how often people search for terms relating to suicide. Phrases like: “Would Everyone Be Happier Without Me?” or “I Feel Suicidal,” and even “How to Commit Suicide,” receive between one thousand and ten thousand monthly searches.
The article features this video by Ganel-Lyn Condie, a woman who lost her sister to suicide.
- Please watch and share this video. You never know who might be struggling.
- See LDS resources at PreventingSuicide.lds.org.
- Find more resources about suicide.
When the church means everything to you but members ignore you when you go to church, no home teachers, no visiting teachers, you feel like no one wants you around. You want to be a part of it but you can’t. Some of us just don’t fit in. We want to but no one wants us there. We try the best we know how but just not let in. I guess the church is just for those with amazing social skills…apparently.
Al, you are definitely not alone. Your ward is probably has many people feeling the same way. If not, my last two wards have definitely been full of them. Everyone wants to have friends and to make those connections, but I think a combination of keeping ourselves too busy, central air conditioning keeping us all inside, social media, and our ever-present devices makes it much harder to form those bonds. My wife has been visited maybe 10 times in the past 5 years, which was especially difficult when she first developed panic attacks. We’ve been home taught probably the same number of times.
If you feel the need, I might suggest talking to the bishop. Perhaps a different calling could help you to get more interaction with people your age (primary, for example, can be a tough calling when you are craving friends). I never thought I would, but I thrived in young mens. My wife serves in Relief Society and has gotten to know many people that way.
My wife and I are trying to make some friends, but we’re definitely out of practice. We went to dinner with a couple from our ward a few weeks ago, and it was our first time doing something like that. We invited another family (who I’ve known since elementary) from our ward over for dinner yesterday and it was our second or third time ever doing something like that. So we’re making some effort, but it will take some time before we feel we have close friends in the ward.
Good luck and keep pushing ahead!
So sorry that some members treat you this way. In the Church, we should all be loving and inclusive. Have you expressed your feelings to your bishop? Perhaps he can assign home and visiting teachers who will make visits.